Suddenly I believe again

Wow has been again a while and you know I'm back every few months (sometimes once a year or every 3 years or something lol)

 I know i've been posting my depressive life since forever and this is more a suicidal blog than a personal one but hey! cant believe what I'm going to say but i'm not feelin that bad anymore and here is an update. (An update for me because i'm the only person who reads this and is a reminder to me of how i felt)
 I'm again cheating on me but I lost a few pounds that makes me felt better about myself for a while, I EVEN TOOK SOME PICTURES OF MY FULL BODY ON THE MIRROR and something even more incredible I TOOK SOME NUDES THAT I DIDNT DELETE IN THE SAME SECOND THAT I TOOK IT! wow, i mean, maybe is something tiny and stupid but for me, if you've been reading this is like such a big deal so yeah, I'm feelin' hope.
 Andddd, the biggest updating that i came here to write (even if i should be studying because tomorrow is like a crazy exams day) I'M GOING TO LIVE IN THE U.S THE NEXT YEAR OMGGGGGGGGGGG, who would it tell that right? I mean, basically in my last post back in may i was about to kill myself or something and about that post, also an update: I MADE AN AMAZING GROUP OF FRIENDS IN MY NEW CAREER something that i was crying about in my last post so wow, this really was a good year- ANNNND I GOT MY DRIVER LICENCE AFTER SOOOO MANY NIGHTS OF CRYING.
I guess this is a good post, maybe the only one that i have made in forever.

 I'm feeling better and maybe life is not as bad as it seems.

Also quick update that I made a mistake and I almost got pregnant lol ME, the one that has been screaming about sexual education everywhere. Omg.

I swear, THIS IS MY YEAR and 2020 gonna be a whole new life, like i'm gonna be a new person.


BYEEEEEEEEEE x

Ugh here we go again.

¿Puede ser posible que cada un par de meses caigo en mucha depresión y vuelvo a instalar la app de Blogger para descargarme acá? Baby, that's just me.

Ok I don't even know what I came here for because literally I don't have an strong reason to feel like shit like I'm feeling. I know my struggles are mostly the same in every post but I don't feel like today that issue is as present as always to be feeling the way I do.
I guess my today's feeling and more like my last hours mood is about feeling kinda nostalgic about how I used to spend my weekends. Guess is only a Saturday mood. And usually I don't give a shit about staying at home on a saturday night but today, ughhhhh I just feel like THE SADDEST alive.
I need this year to be different, I need to go through my fears and my normal personality and get to know some new people and do more things that used to make my happier.
But again I find my self doubting, because has been 7 years since my last year on high school, things seemed to be so easy those times... Like I never really were the kind of easy going person but I used to have so many friends those days and was eeeeasier. Now I struggle speaking to people I don't know so much. Like ughhhhh I want to punch myself sometimes.

I guess I'll be updating this in a few months with a bigger depression maybe? Lol but really I need to get a life.
Like asap.